Waiting for Daddy…#28

A languid sky, a lazy breeze moved the cotton stalks rolling like an emerald sea, the crimson dirt warm between my toes.  I stood in the middle of my pretend sea, my imagination open within itself creating my own world.  A world I sometimes had to hide in quietly as not to be seen or heard.

Through the rays of the afternoon sun, I could see the pasture with a cool creek winding among several old oaks where a tire swing hung.  I moved my arms swimming through the tall stalks gazing at the sky making my way to a nearby clover field.

The only noise was that of a braying mule, Soap Sticks. The swish of a Hawk flew over my head, riding upon a warm Southern breeze watching for the signs of field mice.  I drowsily heard the pounding of my daddy’s big red Roan on the nearby dirt road, I knew that Buttermilk my old dog would be running beside him; it was time to go home. 

It was Sunday, the only day my mother was home. Today I rode upon the emerald green sea toward a world of imagination toward jungle trees where I could climb high above the dangers of the land.  I drank cool water from a babbling brook and hid in a field of soft lush grasses.  I was not afraid of the strange noises floating through the air or the giant bird of prey.  I waited, unafraid until I heard my Knight in shining armor, my daddy found me, upon his big red horse followed by a gentle dog came to rescue me.  It was now safe to go home.

Love and Peace




Artwork by Author – Acrylics – Daisy’s under a cloud covered moon. A Dragonfly pulling sweet nectar from a single Daisy. Daisy’s feed upon Wild Iris’s near a pond, they go back and forth from flower to flower.


We are Americans…#27

We are Americans, we do not stand idle when other foreign countries fall prey upon their own citizens. 

We are Americans, we do not stand idle when men, women and children from foreign countries are abused and killed.

We are Americans, we do not stand idle when other foreign countries tortured or kill anyone at any time.  

We are Americans but we have stood idle while those in power in our own country stand idle while the country is being manipulated toward dictatorship instead of that of strength and compassion

We are Americans, why do we allow our leader to act as a terrorist in his own way, separating children from their parents (Remember the Holocaust).  Demanding loyalty from those who serve him or they will be removed from their positions (Remember Hitler).  He is also disrespecting the office for which the Americans gave him.

The list could go on, but we need to remember that we are Americans and we will not allow this country to fall back fifty years.  We have the ability to build up the America we once knew before its basic principles are destroyed.

We can as Americans change the landscape of our nation.  America can be saved… do not vote for dictatorship.  VOTE!

Love and Peace



Living with Grace and Spirit…#26

I believe in existence of God who creates an everyday fight between the mind and spirit.   Believing that God has set down in life’s book a predestine path to walk is a struggle between faith and doubt.  Living with Grace and Spirit. The disbelief in a God leaps out of the undergrowth of insecurity and becomes a poison racing through the veins of trust, and the pathway through life becomes a thicket of mistrust and betrayal.  Whatever your beliefs may, you enjoy your life; always enjoy the world we live in because Heaven may be the air we breathe and the joys of our lives.

Love and Peace


Authors Note:  God views your relationship with him as permanent. Referring to all those who believe in him, Jesus Christ said of us, “I know them, and they follow me; and I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish, and no one shall snatch them out of my hand.”



Artwork Acrylics by Author


Your life’s plan changes daily by events

that happen to you along the way; the

outcome based on every decision that has

ever been made, past and present. 

Expectations written into your plan may

never be met.

Yet one can survive a lifetime pretending

to belong, that is all one might get.  Feelings

are a privilege for those who have had and

never lost, for those who have locked the

doors on their emotions for the sake of pleasing

 others have done so at a great cost. 

Living details, moment-by-moment experiences

 in life, these are the most important things,

not strife. Remember you played the part?

Love and Peace


Authors Note:

We all have expectations in our lives: what we want out of life and who we want to become. If you do not have expectations, you can never be disappointed. Often we tend to believe that the way we treat others will be the way we are treated in return. Nevertheless, unfortunately, this does not always happen.

You need to find people who appreciate what you do for them and who will reciprocate these actions.  Having realistic expectations will allow you to accept the flaws each person has. We need to learn how to take responsibility for our own lives and our own decisions before we can expect others to do the same. Do you feel excited about waking up in the morning to start your day?  You are finding the meaning of life.




Artwork by Author – Personal Gallery

Run Don’t Walk…#24

Life is a struggle, nights daring to

dream under God’s blue or black veil,

wasted youth and bitter truth? 

Days and nights wandering through

jagged valleys of pain, climbing mountains

built of chaos.  My words left unheard,

 knots of certainty and answers left tied traveling

a rough road of living that sometimes show

upon the bones of time. 

Wind has scattered feelings across the land

of hurt as tears, fall upon the dust of shattered

Soul’s remains of wanting happiness and love.   

Must one be cheated of any dreams, are we

safe with them, heart and soul like sewing the

torn heart back together, the torn fabric of life.

The tarnished needle will leave scars and pain.

Love and Peace


Author’s notes:  Has someone subjected you to these atrocities.

1. Humiliating or embarrassing you.  Has someone done this to you in front of your family or friends?

2. Constantly putting you down.  Has someone made fun of how you are dressed, hair and clothes?

3. Subjecting you to hypercriticism.  Continues to judge you on everything you do.

4. Refusing to communicate or giving you the silent treatment.  Never home to communicate.  However when you are both home, do you have conversations.

5. Ignoring or excluding you.  Does this someone ignore you are makes only plans for them to attend, excluding you.

6. Having extramarital affairs.  Does the person you are talking about “cheat”?

7. Displaying provocative behavior with someone of the opposite sex.  Does this happen to you often.

8. Use of sarcasm and an unpleasant tone of voice at your expense.  Yes, all the time.

9. Unreasonable jealousy.  Never jealous, does not care enough to be jealous.

10. Extreme moodiness.  Always!

11. Making mean-spirited jokes or constantly making fun of you.  Continuously.

12. Saying, “I love you, but …”.  Saying I love you without it being true.

13. Saying things like, “If I did not have you _____.  If you have ever heard these words, they are wrong.  

14. Attempts at domination and control.  No attempts, actually does control all the time.

15. Withholding sex or affection.  No, just was never a question, but this person did enjoy his time “out”.

16. Subjecting you to guilt trips.  All the time.

17. Making everything your fault.  Yes, continuously. 

18. Isolating you from friends and family.  Did you have to give up “your” friends and only have friendship he chose?

19. Using money to control you.  No, you were the breadwinner!

20. Constant calling or texting you when you are not together.  No, they do not care enough to call or text.

21. Threatening to commit suicide if you leave.  Constantly.



Artwork by Author

Heart of Stone…#23

A heart of hate belonging to another whose eyes could cut into a soul like a swordsman’s steel.  The tiny figure ever so small always stiff and frozen.  The elders face burning with passionate hatred and dislike caused trembling and terror.  A Heart of stone, no tears would ever fall from those eyes that could bring harm with only a glance.  A quietness on the outside, a certain charm; the soul metaphorically carried arrows and sling that could pierce and bruise.  The invisible hands of hate tore apart a child’s heart and it would forever lay slit open.  After decades of trying to be loved, the tiny figure grew into an adult, one day buried the Heart of Stone, and found themselves growing old; old body, old memories.  The thought of the another who had been gone for years still put fear into the old soul that never forgets the Heart of Hate.     

Love and Peace


This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is cropped-12.30.2018.jpg

Author’s note:  I have been thinking of the many words or phrases that I have used throughout my life when thinking of a heart that knew nothing but hate.  It is not possible to know at what age a child can begin to think of the personality of their parents or their own.  Impersonal, uninvolved, closed, shutdown.

A parent that is detached, distant, characterizes a schizoid personality disorder, which–at their extreme–cold people can sometimes be); a parent that is self-absorbed, withdrawn, emotionally unavailable, unfeeling, affectionless; unsmiling–straight-faced (or stone-faced/ stone heart), cold-hearted, no empathy or compassion, angry, hostile.  This was my mother!

Books by Author at Amazon.com

The artwork by the Author is acrylics on canvas. First, Native American medicine man, middle, Native American mother and child, third right Native American family Acrylics.

A Walk in Brightness…#22

You try to absorb rather than being absorbed, have you not done this too well.  Life cannot be lived without pain; one must learn from the lesson life gives so freely, if you never learn, if you keep returning to the pain that feels so real, nothing will ever change. 

Do you find that when you try to be happy, absorb the joy, nothing changes, your life feels like a pickaxe in the heart, you are deeply engaged in its meaning, learn.  You tremble with fear, lie down and hope life will pass quickly while you hide in the shadows of the darkness of time. 

Have you salvaged from the lessons life teaches enough to walk into the brightness of what will come beyond this tormented world, to walk in brightness is to know that happiness is just beyond the golden curtain.


Love and Peace



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Women of the Desert – Acrylics – 656 X 478 – Arizona 2009

Hidden Emotions…#21

Conception, birth, the process of growing older, and dying, the lifecycle travels quickly and then the final chapter written.  There are no exceptions, an age and date separates all living beings.  My strength lies in the middle developing a sense of self…we bloom or we lay in waste with the fading of seasonal growth.  Deep within there is a remembrance and emotion deeply hidden in the heart, quiet.  You may be a ghost of what you once were…but you are still a living being and the world applauds the reason for your birth.


Love and Peace


Author’s Note:

Although most doctors recommend a non-drug treatment for depression and hidden emotions, that was not the case for me; drugs was a necessity.  In the many stages of depression I deal with there are countless emotions.  I have only recognized and speak openly about these emotions in recent years; it began when I was in my pre-teens; my mother called me moody and my daddy never argued with my mother.  My emotions rang from inward fear, anger, grief and shame.  However, I was never allowed to talk about any of them.  In the Deep South during my younger years I would hear talk of neighbors and classmates being placed in asylums, I learn quickly to suppress my feelings.  My emotions were unbearably painful.  We learn as both children and adults, “Don’t be so emotional! We are taught two extremes: either hide or act out emotions. I chose to hide mine. 

Books Located at: Amazon:


Looking at Evil…#20

America being tarnished by a man that is EVIL and I believe he carries deep within him the desire to bring every American to their knees and become a dictator.

Donald Trump recently, on twitter dishonored John McCain, months after his death. Trump is showing Americans just how low he will stoop to get himself back in the “public eye” of those who are still Trump supporters and those who believe that he is an embarrassment to the office he holds.  Trump is not worthy enough to speak of such a great man as, John McCain.

And, attention is what he wants, the only thing he wants, to have all eyes on him.

Trump is “EVIL”… there are people who will do anything to get their way; Trump is that type of individual.  Currently, we all need to be protected from Donald Trump.  May God help us all, including those around the world that may feel the impact Trump has on the World?

Pray for Love and Peace


Guns and religion do not kill; the people using them do…#19

Using religion to justify killing is wrong, it is time that we separate the killing fields of the world, the use of religion to kill, and stop the evil individuals or groups that want to keep people everywhere terrorized.  Religion is used daily to terrorize, intimidate and bring harm to people.  Religion is one that some people use to kill and it is hard for me to wrap my head around. 

I am a spiritual individual that does believe in a higher power emotionally.  However, I believe in many other religions, I find something in their doctrine that I can grasp; I was baptized in a Baptist Church at 12 years old, I taught Sunday school in a Baptist church for 10 years, I called upon my own beliefs when I said special prayers for general living, health, and when the earthly body is wrapped in death.  Religion is not unlike family traditions during holidays or celebrating a birth; I celebrate the death of those I am acquainted and love ones.  I found some old research on religion and that will be the subject of my post today.

It is said that the world’s first religion on earth is the AFRIKA RELIGION, born in the Sacred Holy Garden of the Creator in Continental Afrika.  I have no proof, nor can I find more that it being an organization, much like other religious organizations.

However, the oldest known religion known to man is Hinduism.  Actually, no one truly knows when the first religion was named.  Nonetheless, Hinduism is more than 50,000 years old.  Animism is another religion that dates back more than 50,000 years.

Islam I understand is about 1435 years old, recognized about 600 years after Jesus.  The core message of Islam is simply “Oneness of God”.  Islam, the Muslim religion originated in the Arabian Peninsula around the year 622 by the Islam Prophet Muhammad who lived in Mecca.  It is said that Muhammad received revelations from God and wrote them down in a book that would become known as the Qur’an.


The first English translation of the Bible was put together by John Wycliffe in the 1380’s then came the Geneva Bible in 1560 And the King James Translation in 1611 and of course, today we have many new translations

Whom do we give credit, it is anyone’s guess; I have a King James Version, I am no longer affiliated with any religious organization, i.e., church.  I know the bible well enough that when it is misquoted I know it.  I raised my children in a home that believed in spiritual association, to find where their own religious experience would benefit them.  There are no right and no wrong when it comes to the beliefs of the many, but it is wrong to use one’s religious belief to do wrong, kill, lie, and steal.

I believe that Martin Luther King, Jr., was a man of his God and that he taught kindness and to love.  Hate will destroy the Earth, and love may just save us all.

 “Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it.”

Martin Luther King, Jr., A Testament of Hope: The Essential Writings and Speeches

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