There are times when I am dreaming outside my door is the gateway to the city of destiny; nevertheless each night when I dream I open the door walking into another sphere of everlasting pain, mentally and physically, a bright light gives me hope. No one pushed me through the gate, I walk willingly and I feel confident that I can handle the tragedy that I know will be waiting there for me. Tucked deep inside my confidence there is fear, within the fear there are secret things, distrust and lies that over shadow happiness and joy.
The darkness is the most evil; a blood red moon framed by the stars hangs above me. Hearing strange tongues frightful and shrill, filled with anger, strikes fear into my heart, they go beyond goodness. Sometimes I weep as the outcries reach my ears, as I do not have a stainless claim to my own life. I fear for the souls, even the depths of hell may refuse them and they will be lost forever in the darkness. Don’t they see the light, the glow of wonder and joy?
I question, is there hope with death, will we have memories of the earth and of the lives that remain when we are gone? The souls that I hear are loud, their tears are blood red, and each is crawling in vile mud. I lower my eyes, on this path to the end will they have rebirth, if they lived in blaspheming is this terrible wailing their fate. Have I done enough to feel the light on my face?
A bitter flood of doubt rushed over me as each pass going to their final resting place. They seem conscious of their nearing doom or happiness. It is in this darkness that each was given a second chance to feel the love of God upon their faces, many refused. At the entrance of another gate, the ground broke from beneath their feet, and I seem to be sinking with them to a meaningless dreadful shore and I am afraid that I will not wake from this nightmare. Will I be given a second chance?
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